Studying Your Emotions
Oftentimes our social lens needs room to manage the disfunction we live out in our lives. Our ambition then becomes the greatest outlet for creativity to spread and captivate the masses. Why then do we allow our emotional hang-ups to influence our capacity to feel? We may be aware that things around us is slowing changing and yet we feel our way through the dark hoping for a sign to appear.
Light is and always will be a sign of things to come. Even now at the tender age of 40 I am aware that a gap in my knowledge exists as it relates to where I am at to where I ultimately want to be. My train of thought then is to close the gap and bring other creative individuals into the circle.
This is where the learning begins. It’s starting to make sense as to why I needed to spend so much of my adult life in Higher Education. I guess you can say it was a feeling out process. It was me figuring out how to manage this Gemini Midheaven and find solace in a specialist kind of way.
Who dreams of becoming a “Jack of All Trades” and fighting to secure your place in this world? Who wants to take those you love and drag them through the process of isolation? The is stage in my life where you can say that “I don’t understand” how to make the most of my talent.
Battling for Relevancy
In a world where billions of ideas, books, movies, recipes, songs, speeches, and documentaries are buried in the graveyards of our planets; it’s a beautiful thing to be alive and conscious that time is all we have. In the blink of an eye tragedy can strike leaving the earth mourning for its due justice.
The same thing can be said for my life’s work. It took a near death accident in 2008 (Car Crash) for me to straiten up and course correct. I learned the value of process and was able to find my voice in the depths of hell. With my hand held high I begin searching for a way to make my pain relevant in the eyes of the world.
Suffering Through the Process
It was in this moment that I realized the value of a new skill in addressing the outdated thinking and philosophical maneuvers of my past ways.
It was all a crash course in “Studying My Emotions”. It was a process of elimination. It was a process of figuring out how to become relevant in my own mind. It was about asking the tough questions like “How can I show up and make a greater impact in my community, family, industry and professional life?”
It was about learning hard lessons in Time Management, Balance, Perseverance, Communication, Human Nature, Patience, Relationship development, and faith. It took me 21 years to study my emotions and to learn that concentration is a must in the line of my work.
In the end, it’s about refusing to knowledge or become aware of your ignorance. It’s not about 20 hours of research around the study of your emotions but that part of you that is seeking expression through those harsh, dark, and lonely places of your heart. You understand the game to a certain degree, but you are just not proficient yet in your gifting which plays out after many years of practice.
Be At Peace.